Decline is quiet. Your father is not going to tell you he has stopped showering. Here is what we look for on a first visit, and what you can look for on a Sunday.
- The same clothes as last time, and the time before.
- Unopened mail, especially bills.
- A fridge full of the same food.
- Bruises on forearms and shins, which are the marks of steadying yourself on furniture.
- A new reluctance to leave the house, or to have you visit.
- Medication bottles that are too full or too empty for the date.
- Scorched pans.
- The heating turned very high, or off.
- Missed appointments, or appointments they do not remember making.
- The bathroom not as clean as it used to be.
- Weight loss you can see in the face.
What to do
Not everything on this list means care is needed tomorrow. Three or four of them together mean it is time for an assessment, and the first step is a phone call to 811, or to us, and a free hour in the house looking at the real situation.




